i needed some ali landry info, so i “surfed” on over to alilandry.info where their bio notes that she and then-boyfriend (now soon-to-be-ex-husband) mario lopez ran the boston marathon for some unmentioned charity in 2002. but if you look closely at the results, you’ll see that they didn’t do so hot. the landry & lopez team finished 14,443 & 14,444 out of 14,573 marathoners who completed the race. only 130 people finished after them, and those were probably all the inspirational guys without legs.

and they don’t fare very well against other celebrities who’ve run the boston marathon, either. their finishing time of 5:41 puts them well behind lisa ling (4:34 in 2001), will ferrell (3:56 in 2003) and mike dukakis (an impressive 3:31 in 1951).

i’m not trying to criticize landry & lopez (and i know there’s no way i could do any better), but if you’re going to run a marathon for charity, you should probably do a little training first. p. diddy spent only 8 weeks preparing for last year’s new york city marathon and still finished in under four hours, raising $2 million for nyc public schools and his creepily-named children’s charity “daddy’s house.”

anyway, what i’m saying is i would rather be friends with p. diddy and will ferrell than a.c. slater and the doritos girl. i think we’d get along really well.

to wrap things up, i would just like to say happy birthday to jesse bradford, star of speedway junky.