for those of you that i only call for “important” matters, i am proud to announce that i recently purchased (leased?) an apartme… i mean, movie called 7 lucky ninja kids for $1.00 at a $.99 store and am almost too confident it will be the greatest. movie. ever.

sure, it might be a good idea to watch the movie first before making a statement like that, but i can tell from the opening credits (that last a glorious three minutes!) that this movie will “change my life.”

interesting facts:

1. the dvd contains a “little rascals” short, which i thought was weird.

2. the movie features the theme to “halloween” and a rip-off of madonna’s “like a virgin” (all in the first five minutes!).

3. the cardboard case has a picture of the skipper and tom selleck.

uh, oh! the 7 lucky ninja kids just went to a high-class restaurant, and something is definitely going to happen there—