everyone’s invited to my new years ‘06 party! except for… whatever, i don’t hold grudges… anyway, to get some buzz going, i’m posting a few testimonials from that big millennium bash i hosted a few years back! remember that? good answer! if you remembered it, you weren’t there!

dorothy kilmer, good friend: “anthony just had “we’re gonna party like it’s 1999” playing on repeat the whole night, which really meant that we partied like it was 1987.”

helen jillmania, co-worker: “anthony prophetically toasted that this millennium will be better than the last. has it been? i don’t know. time will tell.”

lindsey goldrush, acquaintance: “i can safely say that it was the best millennium party i’d been to that day.”

mike adams, co-worker: “his apartment looked a lot bigger from the outside. he’s overpaying big time for that place.”

ken scranton, brother-in-law: “at the end of the night, anthony finally revealed his millennium resolution, and it was a little embarrassing. i didn’t really need to know that about him.”

david stoich, walk-in: “the chips were old… the dip was just terrible… there weren’t enough napkins… my hands were dirty the whole time.”

wilma june, girlfriend: “i didn’t show up, but to this day he thinks i was there. i don’t have to tell you that there were better parties.”

jessica brasco, friend: “who? what?”